Elva Without Her Stars

…and the rest of the nation kisses is chains…

Voltaire

Blue is the only color I’ve ever understood

Blue is the color of empty sound.

In truth, I’m terrified of empty sound.

I despise its reverent politeness

but I still love the color blue.

Almost every day I see him in his black t-shirt

and I despise the politeness that separates us

but I’m too polite to challenge it

and I still love seeing him

and hearing his voice.

“How are you?”

Well, truthfully, I’ve a stomachache

from eating too much ice cream.

You see, I’m still overcoming those

bulimic tendencies.  How about you?

How are you today?  Did your

black t-shirt fare well in the washing machine?

How long have we known each other

without really knowing each other?

Four years.  It’s been four years

but I’m not really a person.

I’m Elva, I’m the little girl.

When he smiles at me he’s

doing his good deed for the day.

I’ve always lived in the shadow of trees

Knowing I’ll never grow that tall.

I’ve always lived unaffirmed.

Even you could not affirm me

despite my blood

but I’m not made of sugar or foam

and I’ll not kiss my chains.

I don’t believe you when you misinterpret the Bible

and I know you don’t believe yourself either

because I’m the daughter and

daughters know these things.

I still read the Bible and I still

believe in God

but I don’t believe in people anymore

they are the hands around my neck

they are the slap across my face

they are the eight ounce glass

thrown at me in rage.

Fate has stolen the stars from my eyes,

stolen the stars from the skies

and I’m left with a fist

and a very economical fluorescent light

but I will not kiss my chains.

I will not speak of blame.

Like Daddy’s eyes

and Mommy’s van

the sky is simply blue.

This entry was posted in Poetry and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

4 Responses to Elva Without Her Stars

  1. James says:

    *speechless*

    Wow.

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